Just when you think it couldn't be as bad as you imagined it could be, then the proof comes out and it's even worse than you imagined. A Black Flag cover band is the main draw for Punk Rock Posing this year, and people are losing their minds over this? Really? I guess those people didn't see the exact same line up of karaoke stars stumble and plod their way through a few songs at the Goldenvoice 30th Anniversary show a few years ago. Here's some video footage in case you didn't see it. Watch how all the bright flashing lights make up for the fact that there's NOTHING going on on the stage, in the audience, nowhere.
 Yeah, so let's assume that the band learns every song that Keith actually sang on while in Black Flag (side 1 of the Everything Went Black album and the Nervous Breakdown single), and, like he does in every band he's in, Keith sings a few classic early Punk Rock songs from the L.A. era (something from the Weirdos or the Dils), and he tells his stories about how much he loves Jeffrey Lee Pierce and The Gun Club, well, let's see, that's about a half hours worth of stage time. Perfect to play a set for the Punk Rock sheeple to line up and pay to be fleeced. And no matter how hard you believe in it, I hate to break it to you, but you're not seeing Black Flag. Sucks to be you, I know. And Bad Religion? What a fucking joke. They haven't been relevant since Against The Grain. Same with The Bouncing Souls. Their last records have sucked so badly it's almost embarrassing to admit to ever liking them at one time. Sub/Hum/Ans? The Damned? OK, good choices, but they might cancel out like other bands from across the pond have done every year in the past. And the rest of the announced bands? Extremely lame. The Lower Class Brats are playing here next week @ LVCS, and I have no idea why they're playing that venue. Are they that big of a draw? Seriously? And D.R.I. just played here a few months ago - same with the $wingin' Utter$ - and I'm sorry to say, but neither one of those shows were very well attended. I have no idea why that is. I guess the secret of putting on an event like this is getting together a bunch of bands who don't draw well on their own and putting them on display in a cattle pen for everyone to stand and stare at. Whatever. Some people like seeing bands up close and intimate, and other people like seeing bands in a Cockstar environment only when it's the 'cool' thing to do. Enjoy your Punk Rock Posing sheeple. I'm planning on staying as far away as possible from that thing. :-)
If you wanna get a real dose of what Punk Rock is supposed to be about, in both Music and Attitude, then come out tonight to the Artifice and check out Unfair Fight and The Fat Dukes Of Fuck. Yeah, I know the gripes about Artifice, and I'm not gonna rebut a single one of them, but when you got a lot of Friends there, hanging out, having fun, then you can really make it into a good time, which is exactly what's going to go down tonight. See ya there!
 I'm kind of embarrassed that people I know are actually excited about the rumored bands that are playing this years Punk Rock Bowling bullshit. I mean, $wingin' Utter$? The Damned? Really? I don't recall the last time those bands played here in Vegas, but what the Hell is the draw in seeing bands like that in a huge festival setting on a stage from hundreds of yards away? Yeah, I know I'm spoiled because I saw both of those bands play in places as small and intimate like the Double Clown or Jillian's, but still, I don't understand standing around like sheep in a pen and just watching the band from a distance, bullshitting with your friends, and basically relegating the band to being background noise for your Facebook picture taking. Same with the Sub/Hum/Ans. Last time I saw them play was @ the Canyon Club downtown a few years ago, and that was fucking soooo much fun! The place was packed and everyone in there was losing their minds over every note they were playing. The crowd singing along was louder than the PA. You could feel the sweat dripping off the walls. That's how you're supposed to see Punk bands, in an intimate setting, not on a gigantic stage from yards away. Fuck that. And I'm not even gonna comment on who that band The Flag is rumored to be. If it's true, then it's just pathetic. Le sigh. One can only hope that there will be something much more better, much more interesting and Punk happening in the Club shows this year than the BS over some guy deciding to become a girl that was the big news last year. Can't wait to see how many acoustic bands are playing this year as well. John Denver was a trailblazing Punk. Who knew? ;-) In all the distress I was going through in the month of Dec., I lost 2 Karl Bakla Music Reviews in the process, and I owe him the biggest apology ever for doing so. I'm sorry Sir, and I hope that my lateness in finally posting them will somehow alleviate your pain and suffering. Well, either that or loads and loads of booze. ;-) Anyways, Karl's review for the latest release from Masked Intruder can be read by clicking here, and his review on some compilation he got from Fest 11 called D.I.Y. 'Til Death, Vol. 1 can be found by clicking here. His stuff is always a good read and again, I'm sorry it took so long in posting it up. :-) And I posted the first Music Review for 2013 from a band called The Moms, and you can click here to read that. Or you can just go to the Music Reviews page by clicking here and seeing what you missed out on. I got lots more stuff that needs reviewing if anyone is interested... hint hint. I've been rocking these 3 songs from The Civilians lately, which were recorded live @ the Bunkhouse the last time the band played there. The sound quality is great and the material is top notch. The songs are Let Go, I'm So Happy and Doin' Time, and you can go to the bands Reverb Nation page ( www.reverbnation.com/thecivilianslv) by clicking here to listen to them. They're really good tunes and I wish more bands here in town would do stuff like this. Everything is updated. There's some cool gigs going on this weekend with Fortunate Youth, Lady Reiko And The Sin City Prophets, Rule Of Thumb, Unfair Fight, The Fat Dukes Of Fuck, The Seriouslys, Xomby, 3D6 and a bunch more bands and DJ's and stuff that I'm not remembering right now. Go to the Gig Calendar page by clicking here to see what's going on this weekend. Plus, Dan is having some of his amazing artwork showcased at that Unfair Fight gig @ the Artifice on Saturday, so bring some extra money to that because you're gonna wanna buy something from him once you see what he's got for sale - I guarantee it. So yeah, this weekend isn't one to be sitting 'round at home / watching the pictures go - no, this is a weekend to get off your ass and do something. Be More Than A Witness. Yeah. ;-) See you at the gigs!
All that separated the Fools from the Cools was a 5 foot high chain link fence! hahahaha I'll leave it to you to figure out which side was which. ;-)
It was while walking around downtown Friday night that I decided on really having nothing to do with this PRB fiasco. It was while watching them set up the stage in the middle of a parking lot and at the El Cortez watching the Sheep trying to get their tickets in the Fiesta Room that I realized how absurd this all was. Here you had a supposedly rebellion oriented little sub-culture of independent free thinkers all looking the same and acting the same and being nice and organized and obeying the rules and conforming to whatever was asked of them, all just to see some bands from hundreds of yards away and to be confined in a little corral like space where they willingly waited around for hours to be flocked and fleeced of everything and anything they had of value. Expensive bottled water? Check! Over priced beers? Check? $5 cover charge to use the GOOD bathrooms? Check! All that over priced liquid has to go somewhere, right? Right! Might as well make a buck or two off of it. There was no In's or Out's, no studded anything allowed in, stupid metal bleachers to sit on, all the band merch was visibly over priced, and that stupid Larry And His Flask band of attention whores was more than annoying with their playing everywhere they could around the event. Fucking dooshbag Scenester hippy acoustic Beard Core bullshit. I fucking hate it. Bite me. Yeah, the Descendents stole the event, and I heard good things about Cock Sparrer, but I thought the Singer was a bit "off" and the drummer was just boring and playing the songs without accents. Boooooo. N.J. Pete told me Stiff Little Fingers killed it, and he knows what's up, so I'll believe that. I didn't make it to any of the Club events, because I'm not a Tool, but I heard All was pretty good from Jeremy, who was drooling over Karl Alvarez all weekend like the sexy fan boy that he is, and Christian told me that Fishbone rocked it pretty good too. Heard nothing else about any of the club shows. Nothing. Oh well. The whole PRB thing was a giant clusterfuck anyways. I felt sorry if anyone paid to stand around in the parking lot and pose for pictures to post on Facebook of you and your friends looking stupid, when everyone knew that you could see everything just fine from various places around the place, like the Motel 8, or the El Cortez parking lot, or even just by standing on the sidewalk. Shit, people were giving away tickets, and the scalpers were selling them below face value. I guess that's what happens when you over sell all the events by 30%, because you anticipate people buying the tickets and not using them. Yeah, the huge battle I was anticipating didn't break out between the Crusty Punx and the Skinheads on the last day, but oh well. I guess that means Punk Rock Bowling will be back next year to fleece the sheep of Las Vegas and I, as always, will be on the outside looking in. Yup. Thanks to Monica and Rebecca for making me miss the gigs. LOL
The gig with the Loud Pipes on Saturday was a hollow victory at best. Beard Core was in full effect with the opening bands all sitting around playing acoustic guitars and singing Bob Dylan hippy shit while throwing in the occasional Punk band cover. Yeah, because I need to hear what Fuck Armageddon, This Is Hell by Bad Religion sounds like slowed down and acoustic. What the fucking fuck is wrong with people nowadays?? I might have to declare war on Beard Core, because this shit is getting out of hand. By the time we played, people were just dying to hear SOMETHING good, and we gave it to them, of course, even though we got out-shined by Rawkmom's band, who I think are called Lazer Wolf. Pretty fucking impressive they were. It was a good night. Thanks to Bree for all the jokes. How was that drumming again? :-)
The Vegascendents gig on Monday was CRAZY! I've never seen the LVCS so fucking full of people. They got rid of the Bull (awwwwww) and have more than 2 bartenders working there now, making getting a drink a breeze. The legal capacity for the place is 700, and the staff there said there was close to a thousand people there for Cock Sparrer the night before. Crazy. Anyways, we played pretty good and got a great crowd reaction from everyone, which was both weird and nice. I still don't understand the 'Covers' thing, but apparently a lot of people do, because by the time Punk Rock Karaoke got on stage, the place was primed and ready to go off. Who knew that the appeal of seeing drunken people warble along to and forget the words to songs that should be burned into their brains from years of overplaying was such a draw? LOL I mean seriously, how do you flub the 'Hey! Ho! Let's Go!' intro to Blitzkrieg Bop? hahahahaha Well, some guy did, and there were plenty other mistakes made, but who cares? It was all in good fun. Some people did good though, like that chick who sang Sonic Reducer without a lyric sheet! Dick Lucas from the Sub/Hum/Ans snarled his way through New Rose by the Damned. Shawn Stern totally flubbed Amoeba, and Amy Carrelli nailed it when doing Cherry Bomb by the Runaways without a lyric sheet! Like I said, it was a fun way to end an epic 4 or 5 day run of drunken, drugged out debauchery with Punk Rock Bowling as the background to it all. Thanks to Michaela for making me miss everything and nothing. :-)
There was no way I'm gonna make it to Guitar Wolf tonight. No fucking way. Like most people, it's gonna take me days to recover from this, so I'm gonna go pop some pills and go get some rest. Hibernation time, I believe it's called. Later.
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