By Karl Bakla
I actually entertained the idea of going to this show & not drinking, but unluckily for me I ran into one of my coworkers on the way to the show, he informed me that there is going to be more layoffs at work, since my hours have already been cut to zero, my chances of being called back to work are now slimmer than my pp. I was no longer on the fence; I was going to get fucked up. When Kurt & I arrived at Favorites it didn’t seem like any Punk Rock action was going to happen, so we headed to the bar & ordered some beer. We drank & drank some more, finally after 4 or so hours of drinking a band called Lambs To Lions began to play. They had a sound similar to Less Than Jake, it wasn’t really my thing, but I did enjoy their cover of the English Beat song Mirror In The Bathroom. I was royally fucked up by this time, so I headed to the toilet to pee, but the weirdest thing happened to me. When I tried to pee my bladder wouldn’t release any urine unless I agreed to poop, but here’s the thing, I am one of those weirdoes that can only poop at 4 star hotels & at home. I was already drunk so I did the unthinkable; I pooped at a public restroom, which was also my first time pooping at a Punk show. I have been going to shows since the late 80’s, so I was glad to discover that there are still new Punk show experiences to be had. When I left the bathroom I was feeling unclean & the band Lambs To Lions were still playing, it was a tough crowd, everyone in attendance was more concerned with whatever they were doing, & the front of the stage was deserted. I have played a show like this & I know it’s rough, but they still gave it all they had. After Lambs To Lions’ set was over, we were informed that the Pinkerton Thugs would not be playing, but Lambs To Lions would be playing a second set. We decided to bail for the Steakout for even more booze. I don’t know what time I got home, but I didn’t wake up till 6pm the next evening. Sure, I didn’t get to see Pinkerton Thugs, & I was too drunk to drive home, but if my car is still parked off of Maryland Parkway when I eventually get a ride up there, then it was a good time after all.
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by GE 138 Things were just beginning by the time Bob and I got into the Motor City Cafe on Saturday night. The parking lot was semi-full, and things were in full swing everywhere around the City. Yeah, there was a lot of other gigs going on around town, but when it's a Friends birthday party, then everything else gets thrown to the wayside. So we walk in and see who's here, and it's a cool little gathering of Local musical talent and I'm proud to say I'm tight with each and every one of them. There's some DJ dude setting up his gear, and Christy is behind the bar, which just means that the drinks served will be generous and strong. The vibe was crazy cool, and I couldn't think of anyplace I'd rather be on a Saturday night than with this gathering of people. This Injun had come to the party bearing gifts, so I added mine to the table with the other gifts, and then I helped myself to the grub that was laid out on every available table top. Gummy, hot pizza adjacent to giant boxes filled with the most delicious cupcakes you can ever imagine were everywhere. I ate one of the double chocolate ones and was sent into a diabetic coma for a few minutes. My heart was fluttering like a hummingbirds wings, and I was sweating like a slave. I tried to counter the effects of the diabetic coma with Jameson's on the rocks but it didn't help. After a little while though it went away, and then I went back to the box and tried one of the lemon ones. :-) I don't know where those things came from, but damn those cupcakes were incredible! hahaha It was a fucking food porn moment for sure. So the first band up was called Lotus, and I was told this was their first ever gig. I think there's already an established band named Lotus, but I'm not sure. Typical Vegas. Booooooo. Anyways, Lotus is a trio of casual dressed fuzzy gentlemen who play some grungy, guitar heavy tunes ala Kyuss or Clutch. They're definitely in the Stoner Rock / Desert Music category, that's for sure. They kicked the evenings festivities off to a room full of enthusiastic supporters, and I was kind of digging what they were throwing down. It was a slow, methodical bludgeoning of the ears. The guitarist was a noodler, and the drummer was a beast. Things were going great until the bass player started having technical difficulties with his gear, which definitely put a damper on the bands momentum. I ventured outside to grab a smoke while the guys in Lotus figured out what was going on. It took them a little bit to get the machine back on the tracks and running and by the time I was done smoking they were done playing. Lotus had to endure some stereotypical first gig problems, but they seemed to recover from it OK. I'll definitely pay more attention to them the next time I see them. They were OK. It took the Civilians a while to set up. Maybe it was just my impatience that made it seem that way, I dunno. By the time they got set up the room was pretty packed, with a majority of the people clamoring around the back of room for some reason. Tony is yelling at them; Come forward! Don't be scared! We don't bite! and the empty spaces near the front of the stage start filling in with bodies. The air conditioner is either not working or not on, so it's getting hot and stinky in here real quick. So Mr. Morrison introduces the band and the riffs start flying fast and furious and just like that the Civilians are off and running. I think they started with Company Man, off their excellent 4 song demo, but I'm not sure. All I know is that the Civilians sounded pretty good. They're mining the vein of bands before them like the Rich Kids, Eddie And The Hot Rods, or maybe even Crime - you know, really well played songs with an attitude - part Pub Rock, part Punk Rock, part Rock 'N' Roll, part Oi!, part whatever. The band is tight and rehearsed and going over well with the crowd. Jason is thrashing away on the bass, doing a great job on back up vocals for a few songs, and even when his bass cabinet kept cutting out and losing power during the set, he didn't let it phase him one bit and he fixed the problem with his amp in the most Punk Rock way possible - he kicked it! The funny part is that it totally worked! LOL Tony Batz is, of course, standing in the darkest corner of the stage, sweating and pounding away at his guitar. He's a pretty good guitar player, but I think it would be cooler if he did it while hanging upside down from the roof. :-) Mr. Trueland Morrison handles the lead vocals and most of the lead guitar work, and does a good job at both. He bears the brunt of being the focus of the band, and it doesn't seem to phase him one bit. He dresses sharp too, just like a front man! haha And it's the birthday boy Pete behind the kit playing the hard pounding beats that keeps the Civilians going as fast as they do. He's drenched in sweat by the 4th song into the set. And since it's his Birthday we all sing Happy Birthday to him mid-set and I think the guy blushed! It was either that or he was succumbing to heat stroke, either/or. It's hot as fuck in the Motor City Cafe, Africa hot, and the band looks miserable playing on the small, cramped stage, but they tough it out and play a great set of songs from their self titled demo, like We Survive and Product, and other cool sounding tunes like I Ride Alone, which was dedicated to a friend that Trueland went to high school with in Indiana (I think), lost touch with like you do after you graduate, and then found him when he moved out to Vegas a few years ago. Cool stuff. The band also did an Exploited and Motörhead cover, and I'm not sure why, because the Civilians don't really sound like either one of those bands, well maybe Motörhead, but that's a bit of a stretch. We Are The Road Crew was a pretty good choice of a song to play though. ;-) Anyways, the Civilians finished up their set completely knackered and drenched in sweat and various body fluids and to generous amounts of applause from everyone in attendance, which was cool, because they earned every bit of it. Great set from the Civilians. I knew this set from the Fat Dukes Of Fuck was going to be pretty sweet when I saw the band stacking up rolls and rolls of toilet paper in front of the drum set. I saw the photos that Bob took of their performance a few weeks earlier. I was prepared for anything. All the bands equipment was white, and they took to the stage wearing white nurse scrubs. I didn't ask why because I really didn't wanna know. It made for a great visual, and now I was just waiting for the music to begin to see if it matched up in creativity with the bands ensemble, and Lord almighty did it ever! The band lurches into this rumbling, plodding hard hitting song about Gawd knows what and everybody in the place gets animated. Brent the singer for the Fat Dukes Of Fuck has a microphone in his hand that's stuffed into one end of a 2 foot long double headed flesh colored dildo. To see him casually singing into it is a bit disturbing. Jarrod's guitar is cranked up loud and he's riffing hard, like concrete hard, and this bass player who looks like some high school kid is rattling the walls with his bass rig. Jeremy from Demon Lung is on drums, and he's perfect for this band. He hits hard, minimalistic and not too flash, and his accents are creative. I love watching good drummers, and Jeremy is definitely a Dale Crover type of sticksman. The band is definitely Melvins like, and that's a lofty compliment not easily handed out. The Fat Dukes Of Fuck sound like a pornographic musical avalanche, consisting of sharp Metal parts and Angry boulder sized Rants that gain momentum the longer it drunkenly rolls down the hill. The people in attendance love it. They also love this whole toilet paper thing the band does while playing. Oh boy do they love it. It's also hands on interactive, which just makes things all the more ridiculous. You see, the band has this self made apparatus that shoots out rolls and rolls of toilet paper in a pretty accurate manner. Brent will be screaming into that dildo microphone of his and shooting off an entire roll of toilet paper in a matter of seconds, in any direction he points the damn thing in. He shoots toilet paper into the air, into the crowd, and into the ceiling fans which are circulating the hot, humid air in the band area, and which, of course, stop working because they're clogged full of fucking toilet paper. Things are getting even hotter and stickier now, and it doesn't deter things one bit. When Brent gets bored with the toilet paper gun, he hands it off to people in the audience who take turns spreading the disease all over the room. Toilet paper permeates the air. People are picking up the toilet paper and throwing it all around. They gather it up like giant snowballs and are tossing them into the air and at each other like retarded drunken children at play. It's fucking great to watch, and the Fat Dukes Of Fuck are supplying the perfect soundtrack to all the madness that's ensuing. I'm sitting at a table in the back, fishing errant pieces of toilet paper out of my Jameson's on the rocks, and just loving everything I'm seeing. The band was fucking killing it with a brilliant display of bravery and originality. I love seeing shit like this. We need more bands like this. Whatever happened to Dangerboner? LOL Whether it's because it's like a pizza oven hot in the room, or whether it's because the band is starting to sober up, it all comes crashing to a glorious end, with the Fat Dukes Of Fuck looking wet, spent and drained. People were applauding and standing around for a bit before heading outside to breathe and cool down in the night air. Actually, the cool part was when they started coming back in to help out the band with the clean up. People pitched in with picking things up and putting all that toilet paper in the trash and not the toilet. The DJ dude that was setting up earlier was now providing the background work music for everyone to clean up the place to, and then after a bit people started dancing and the vibe changed from Punk Rock to 60's Ska in the blink of an eye. I saw the sun was coming up so I headed home. It was a pretty sweet Birthday party, and an even better Punk Rock gig. Combine the two and you have an exceptional evening of FUN! Happy Birthday Pete! You sure had one Hell of a birthday celebration, that's for sure. Let's do it again next year, shall we? I'm buying! :-) by Karl Bakla We got to the show late & walked in during the third bands last song, which went something along the lines of, “I drink beer” or some shit. I don’t know what their name was, but that one song was a short Punk ripper about one of my favorite subjects. Sometime during this band’s set one of the PA speakers blew & the rest of the night was left with limited vocals. Next up was Reproacher. They had a heavy duty Hardcore sound you could feel in your teeth. The kids seemed to love this band & they went total ape shit. I was old, so I sat at a table, deciding if I should break my new “drinking once a week” rule. The Singer seemed to be very passionate about what he was singing about, but with only one PA speaker & the band being loud as fuck, you couldn’t hear a word, but the fact that he still went all out, was awesome. I wish I was that kind of person, but I am not. I am the type of person who plays a show drunk & after 5 songs, I throw my guitar through the drummer’s bass drum & walks off. I wish I made that up. I liked Reproacher a lot they would fit nicely on a comp between Converge & Integrity. The third band we caught was Bloom, one of the members had no shoes on; I immediately knew I wouldn’t like them, but I have been wrong before, so I thought I’d keep an open mind. Then the band turned off the TV that was behind them, killing any chances of me catching Gerard Ramalho on the nightly news. The band wanted to put on some fancy red lights & the Channel 3 news would disrupt that. I hate bands with fancy lights, but I was still trying to be positive. Sitting next to me was Bethany, she had a cocktail in one hand & a shot of tequila in her other; I hate people that give me shit for drinking every day, that drink in front of me! So what, if she has had to bail me out of jail because I was drunk, cleaned me up because I got into a street fight because I was drunk, & now the bed smells bad because I made pp in it because I was drunk. I get that she has worked all week & I have stayed home not bothering to put on clothes, but I am a sensitive Artist. Back to the band, Bloom starts to play; they were very slow & very heavy. I get the importance of Black Sabbath’s music & understand they are influential, but I would rather listen to I Like It by Gerry & The Pacemakers than War Pigs, so we went outside. I know I didn’t dig Bloom, but I have to admit, the people inside were rocking out big time. Even though I have the best taste in music, I recognize that the majority of the world doesn’t always agree. The last band I saw was Metal as fuck, with tons of guitar solos, & a guy in the crowd head banging. The singer looked like a mini Tom Araya, it was like I was transported back to a time when Metal scared the shit out of religious zealots. Then some vagrant came in with his dog, ruining my time travel. I don’t know if this hobo didn’t get the memo, but for those that haven’t received it, here is a reminder; don’t bring your dog to a show, & if you do bring your dog to a show, definitely don’t bring it inside the venue. Yes, some jackass vagabond brought his dog into the show, then stood in the middle of the pit with his dog sitting behind him. His dog was very well behaved, even though it was tripped over several times. Some fuck in the crowd even had the nerve to pick up the dog, to simulate the dog fucking some unsuspecting person’s ass. The drifter with the dog was told, “Get the fuck out”, & “your dog shouldn’t be inside here”, but the crusty motherfucker stood there with a daft look on his face. When his dog was once again tripped over by people slamming, he reluctantly hid his dog under a table. Fuck, I hate gutter punks! Fuck the people who kept slamming even after realizing the dog was there. I left the show in total disgust. By Dean Pascucci False Cause goes on. This show was the informally called Cooler Lounge Reunion. I happened to be in attendance for one of the last, possibly THE last Cooler Lounge show and witnessed False Cause’s set. At that show the completely nude bass player laid down an onslaught of a crushing set which included his naked ass grabbing drinks off of the waitress’s trays who unknowingly walked too close to the stage, downing the drink and tossing the cup before the waitress could do anything. In the process the bass player somehow pissed off the guitar player, the guitar player storms off the stage kicking over what was surely a difficult to build back lit sign with the bands logo. The drummer and bass/vocalist were un phased by this and continued to lay it down so righteously that the guitar player later returned mid song, exchanging a kiss and make up glance from across the stage. So needless to say I had high hopes for False Cause to cause Punk Rock shenanigans. However none such high jinx occurred but what did occur was a very respectable set with a vocalist they did not have the last time I saw them but who was great. Maybe he’s been in the band for years? I don’t know I've been down range. His vocal tone and delivery were a good fit for the band. At some point during the show the vocalist must have cut his head open because he had blood coming down his face which I grant him cool points for, unless the gash was deliberate, in which case I must retract the cool points and issue dedication points. Bottom line is that this band is awesome to watch, the drummer and bass player make it look so easy and the band rocking and playing together solidly makes me realize this whole band is really good at this hardcore business. Last Rites, I do not like these guys personally and that is why it pains me to say they fucking tore the house down. This band rocked! I don’t know why they’re not signed, maybe they are, maybe they were, I honestly don’t know but they flow, with groves and heaviness that’s not always trying to prove how fast they can go but how heavy they can lay it down. I hear influences from Suicidal Tendencies and Deftones in them. This is one of those bands that make dudes with short hair bang their head. My goodness they brought it. I was pumping my fist, banging my head and pogoing, and I even made a brief and ungraceful stint in the circle, which is saying allot for this old man to even get off his ass and stand up when a band plays, let alone all that tom foolery. Loved their Agent Orange cover and the crowd defiantly did too. I saw some skate punks representing during that song. Last Rites is a Vegas gem. I hope they always play shows together, and I am looking forward to seeing their next one. |
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