Fast, Fucked & Furious - The Humpers

'Hey! You look pretty good for a guy who was born in the 60's'... hahahahahaha This would of been the best compliment ever if it didn't come from the doorman @ the Beauty Bar after checking my ID. LOL Yeah, it was that kind of a weekend, a lucky weekend, where the dice kept hitting 7's every time I threw them and my cup of Alcohol never seemed to get empty. If you stayed at home, you missed out. I'm not even gonna get into some of the more outlandish bullshit excuses I heard from people on why they weren't attending. Your Loss. Friday night the Rip Offs DESTROYED the LVCS, with a set so full of Punk Rock goodness that the Promoter threatened to pull the plug on the gig like, at least 5 times, on account of the Hatred and Abuse being thrown at the band in various ways, shapes and forms, from alcohol being spit directly on the band from the people in front against the barriers, to people just spitting mouthfuls of snot on them from every direction imaginable, and there were people throwing handfuls of change at the stage just hoping to hit something or someone, anyone, and, of course, full glass beer bottles being thrown with sniper like accuracy. Same with tall boy PBR's and plastic water bottles. There were more than a few Justin  Bieber moments during the set! hahaha Gawd damn if I tell you I haven't seen anything like that since the good ol' days of Punk Rock back in the 80's. It very well could of been the Germs up on the LVCS stage, that's how Epic this gig was, and the fact that some people stayed away and didn't attend due to, ahem, various bullshit reasons, well, that just makes me laugh. You missed out on a good one. Oh man did you ever. This video footage, taken by a man who is just as Smart as he is Handsome, Joe 1/2 Ast, gives you an idea of just how majestic this gig was. It was like being @ the Wet Stop again! hahahahaha

Yeah, it was that kind of night. The Zeros did an AMAZING job of following up on the mayhem and Chaos that the Rip Offs had created by counteracting it all with some fucking Glorious pop songs that put a lot of the stuff that the Ramones did to shame. Musical Bliss and Heaven, it was. I bought a record and lost it somewhere. You're welcome to whoever found it, ya bastards!

Saturday found me waking up, baking up, showering up, grubbing up and drinking up @ the Beauty Bar for Round 2 of the Shake Down. Friday night it was all about Guinness and Patron, Saturday night it was about Jameson's and pharmaceuticals by the handful. It seemed like a good idea at the time, and in the end I'm glad I did because although the Dragons were Godhead, the Humpers were Godslayers, and my body bore much of the brunt of the battle, as I was front and center on the front line of the War between Band and Audience. "Gilbert, it is time to destroy the Beauty Bar", Jesse Jerk told me, and I could think of no better band to destroy this place to than the Humpers. The Perfect Soundtrack For Chaos and Destruction. They fucking KILLED IT! They laid waste to the place, and strutted among the ruins afterwords, pitying the survivors, and Proud of their accomplishments, like the drunken Hooligans that they are. The Humpers played one of the best sets I've ever seen any band play in my whole miserable existence on this Earth. Ever. Wow. Just fucking Wow! I couldn't even watch the Mau Maus  afterwords because I felt ashamed to be alive after what I had just witnessed. I believe it's called Survivor's Guilt. I had it bad, so I situated myself on the corner of the bar where Deana took care of me with King Kong sized cups of Jameson's on the rocks until I was shit faced enough to drive home. Lucky. All weekend long. I couldn't make it to Sunday nights events, on account of my legs not working, my back not moving, and my bruises very much hurting. I wouldn't of gone anywhere near the Beauty Bar, where some bands I wanted nothing to do with were playing, but I think I missed out on some Cake and Whiskey @ the LVCS for Kate's Birthday party happening there. Oh well. I came home Broke, Beaten and Hungover. I think that means I had fun! LOL It was worth everything I put into it. The Shake Down was a fantastic fun time. If you missed it kill yourself now. Show Reviews forthcoming.

A band called Forth Yeer are playing @ Yayo Taco tonight, and if you are encouraged to attend. Xtal says they're pretty good, and she's got great musical taste, although I am worried about her new band. ;-) There's a gig happening tomorrow with Life's Torment and Short Attention Span @ the Redstone House, and on the same day @ Stonewalls you got Caravels and Rooftops. I won't be at any of those gigs, but there's no reason why you shouldn't be. I don't think I'll be going to any gigs for awhile. I just saw the Humpers. Who else is even gonna move me enough to make the effort to see them play? What band is even gonna come close to doing what the Humpers did @ the Beauty Bar on Saturday night? Like I said, the Dragons were good, but the Humpers were better. Much better.

The Pictures of the Rip Offs are up. I put the rush on them, since it's so easy now to put photos up on the website, figuring that more than a few people would be interested. Click here to see them. I like my Pictures. They're funky and soulful. Sometimes it's not about the clarity of the picture, but more like what the picture conveys about an event or time or feeling. Sometimes. Anyways, I gotta get some sleep. I think I'm going to a BBQ party with the Lower Class Brats later on today, but I'm not sure. I just hope they don't ask me what I think of their band... hee hee hee