Some records come out and they are the stuff of instant Legend. Some albums come out and it's only after all the band members have died from food or drug overdoses that their musical output is deemed Legendary. And some bands are only Legends in their own minds. This long time coming debut release from the Mapes is all of those and more! LOL Containing more hits per second than Elton John has hats (and other things) in his closet, the Mapes have released the Damion of Local Music here in Las Vegas with this CD, a release that is going to mature and get more powerful as the years pass until ultimately, it will consume and destroy us all. It's that fucking good. Opening up with a song called Your Pussy Makes Me Vomit, how could it not be? Clocking in at around 20 minutes, this album is the perfect collection of some of the best songs to ever come out of the poor, heat baked, tortured, alcoholic souls of some of the crazed aggregations who are trapped here in the Las Vegas basin. More catchier than Herpes and Syphilis combined, these mini-Epics of monumental stature lyrically run the gamut of all sorts of things, from subjects like Dingos, Anal Sex, Tits and Cannibalism, all things which are considered staples of any classic Punk Rock album. The music on here is just as amazing too, with flourishes of semi-brilliance shining through the limitations of 3 chord song stylings. I'd like to think that they were drunk as skunks when they recorded all these tracks, but the music sounds too good for that to be true. The guitars are driving and gritty sounding. The bass is thunderous. The drums are right in your face and loud, propelling and accenting the Mapes musical output to even greater heights of musical lunacy. It's all in the drums, kids. Seriously. This digitally encoded piece of plastic contains the secrets to our survival as a species, and unless you all go out and buy as many copies of this debut release as you can, listen to the message that lies within, and then spread that Mapes message like the Gospel that it is, then we're all doomed to die like the dinosaurs we are. You have been warned. Available from Underground Government Records.
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