So a very good friend of mine told me he tried to kill himself recently... No, strike that.
What my friend tried to do was guilt me over his recent suicide attempt, all because I unfriended him on Facebook in his moment of need, "on the worst day of his life", "after a complete mental breakdown".
This jerk of an ex-friend and band mate of mine recently joined a musical group of assholes here in town. I loathe to call them a band because that adds credibility to their futile musical endeavors. So he joined up with them, and I unfriended him on social media because of it. I don't need crap from him and that band cluttering up my news feed, so I deleted his stupid ass - stupid because he joined them, and stupid because he must of thought I'd be OK with it or something.
News flash Emo Boy - social media is NOT real life. It doesn't matter. Nobody should care, but they do. I unfriended you. Big deal. I'm friends with plenty of people in real life who I'm not friends with on Facebook, for various reasons, but in real life, when we're together, it's all milk and honey. It's nothing to get hung up about. Seriously. And as for the suicide thing, well, if you wanna do the most selfish act that a human could possibly do to another human, go right the fuck ahead asshole. It's your prerogative and is always the "cool, cool thing to do", right? You wanna just up and quit on life? Go ahead and do it. Let your friends and family you leave behind clean up your mess, and let everyone else get your affairs in order, because obviously you didn't have the gumption or the know-how to do it yourself. And please, oh PLEASE don't let this "suicide attempt - cry for help" thing be about the girl you just got dumped by / broke up with - oh PLEASE don't let it be that cliche of a thing. That's too pathetic. And I'm not even going to get into the fact that you have a kid, a kid that you apparently forgot about when you were thinking "nobody loves you" and you have nothing to live for while you were staring down the barrel of that gun in your hands. A fucking kid you dipshit. What a fucking great Dad you are, right? To put that on your daughter? Dickweed. I'm glad your "friends" were there for you in your darkest hour, and I hope you come out of this a better man and father, but don't try to guilt me into feeling bad about abandoning you when you needed me most just because you joined a band you know I can't stand. Fuck you dillhole.
"If you want sympathy / don't come to me."